Huang Yixi Vicson

Date : Wednesday, August 16, 2006
Time : 10:59 pm

someone please tell me..

is it actually possible to solve a problem/conflict

through a couple of msges??

adding a few 'fake haha..lol..or hahhas' in

the latter stage of the msges..

i realli do not noe..

well..it seems i have got a few days of peace studying in school..

without the 'conflict' being 'postponed'..

having forced myself to smile for a photo on MY birthday celebration..

put on a 'mask' for the whole night till you left..

and yet all you could let out from your mouth was just a 'bye'??

not even a 'happy birthday' even though its advance??

can you even remember wat you wrote

on the card tat contributed to the album..

in which was a success??

'cant wait to see the look on your face again'

yes..you did saw the look again..

and when i managed to open my eyes to take a look around..

you were the first person tat i saw..

and all i saw was a emotion-less face..

my heart just went'down down down'..

not because of wateva tat happened recently..

but even being a 'supposedly' close fren of mine..

cant you even just manage a smile..

even when it means putting up a show??
it could have change the whole night..

on how i was feeling..

tat is how powerful just 1 smile can be..

just imagine if you would continue to put tat

lovely smile of yours on your face..

it could mean a whole lot of changes in our lives..

well..it may seem like i wan to lose this friend of mine..

but fact is i do not wan to..

having brought each other through difficults times..as frens..

its just so hard to let it go..

treat the person like a total stranger..

i myself would say tat its cruel..totally cold-hearted..

to even have these kind of thoughts..

so would i even bring myself to having these thoughts/ideas..

its a definite NONONO!!!

it may seemed sloved..but deep down in my heart..

the truth is..its not..emm..maybe just a little of it solved??

forcing myself/trying real hard to let go of you..

but the more i dun think of you..

it comes back more..even harder each time..

if only someone could provide me with a solution

to forget the events tat have happened..

and tat could revert back to the kind of relationship

tat we had over the few years..i would just be so so thankful for it..

sadly..its not possible..some more with the after effects of everything..

hai..guess tats abt it..cant bring myself to write any more..

just feel like letting all out again..

if only i could have the 'perfect' birthday from you..

a sign/signal tat everything is resolved..

how nice could it actually get..hai..

still all lies down to the word..IF..

VIc^