Huang Yixi Vicson

Date : Thursday, August 31, 2006
Time : 12:18 pm

one question for myself..

why continue to stress myself on that/this issue??

guess its a total waste of my time to salvage whatever tats left..guess you realli meant wat you said..

msn you..no reply..

tag your board..never reply it.but replied your friend's tag..

msg you..oso nv reply..

nothing much i can do abt it..if you wan it..then you can have it..have your new group of friends..afterall..its not my choice but yours..well..shant elaborate much any more..but just wan to let you noe..

to me..the friendship is and will still be there..

its your choice if you wan to take it back or not..yup..

and i shall say it again..i do not wan to lose such a good fren..think abt it..tats all..ciao~

VIc^

Date : Monday, August 28, 2006
Time : 6:04 pm

must i always be the one who takes the first move??now both online..but nothing's happening..would you still tell me tat when you are online,i am not online or wat??

Lord..help me please!!i so do not noe wat to do!!

Date : Saturday, August 26, 2006
Time : 11:08 am

alright..you can say tat you have stayed back in school for the past weeks..but its a fact tat i dun see you..cuz i hav been staying back to study as well..so prob its just a 'you go and i come' stuff..and its like how would i noe you are online and stuff??its like i will be online the whole day if my parents are not in..and this i shall just take it as a 'you go and i come' thing again..abt you msging me..just want to let you noe..these few weeks..when i have got msges coming in..i am just hoping tat its you..but each time it seems to disappoint me..each and everytime..other then tat time when you did msg me..

i will still treat you as a friend..but i would not want this kind of treatment any more??mean its like everything starting coming and happening after i found out abt you and him..i just do not noe why its liddat..come to talk abt being upper sec now..you yourself is sec 3 now..and things should have been better..but it seems its going in the opposite direction..

and i will still stress on this fact..i DO NOT wan to lose a good fren like you..seriously..think abt it..you still wan to salvage this friendship over these 3 years..then let me noe..i am willingly to just let everything go..and start afresh as friends..tats if you wan to..i shall say again..there's a limit in wat i can do..the rest is up to you and also to God..tats all..ciao~

VIc^

Date : Friday, August 25, 2006
Time : 9:37 pm

today was just like any other friday los..

first two period..mt..got scolded for not doing work yesterday..guessed it kinda hit me..just dun understand how can peter and shawn still laugh..maybe they still have not found the seriousness of the fact tat Os are approaching soon..then the rest of schooling hours were no much different..study abit..talk abit..sleep abit los..

may seem its taking forever..but i think i have woken up and gotten out of lalaland..not tat i dun wanna study..just tat i dun have the self-discipline to study..to just sit there for at least 2 hours..doing nothing else but study study study..

its like sometimes when i WAN to study..l have to do other stuff..or parents will ask me do this do tat..and by the time i am done..get tired and sleep..hai..i dunno wat to do!!

Lord..please help me!!

after school..played soccer..lke from abt 130 -6??not much people played though..by the time was around 4+think only dion,hadi,xing gui and i around only..haha..did stupid stuff la.like trying to kick the ball against the goalpost and stuff..stupid but fun..haha..then came home..

guess tats abt it..nothing much happen..yup..ciao~

VIc^

Date : Wednesday, August 23, 2006
Time : 7:49 pm

well..haven been blogging lately..so here goes..

like finished my 'O' level english oral on monday..had to wait like damn freaking long la..cuz was like the last one??for my team..but luckily got steph..haha..she second last 1 from the other team..but same waiting location..haha

was like easier then i thought..but the starting was like so damn funny la..haha..here's how it went..

waited outside the library..waited for the examiner to signal me to go in..then signal me..went in..and walk towards the location..when reach there..

male examiner stretched out his hand..and instead of handing him my IC like wat i was supposed to do..know wat i did??

I SHOOK HIS HAND!!

haha.and he was like

examiner:nonono..your IC please..
me:oh..sorrie..sorrie..totally forgot abt it..
examiner:nvm..its alright..you are the first student to do it..emmm..so can i have your IC??

passed it to him..

examiner:so you are Vicson..??
me:yup..its like the first time a teacher gets my name correct on the first try(i lied..haha)..
examiner:oh..izit??(laughs)

then suppose to start..but i was like still thinking about wat happen..and started laughing..haha..then after i calmed down then started reading the passage..haha..whole thing wasnt as difficult as i thought..haha..picture was okie la..was like looking for 'help' in the passage..as its linked wat..haha..then conversation..was abt some exercise and stuff..then wat do you think on the statement 'its never too old to learn'..its like so wanna thank God la..haha..cuz everything was likein my favour..used my dad as an example..talked abt wat they saw in canada..like how the bus driver would help a handicap person get onto the bus and stuff...and the examiner was like 'oh..realli??'..haha..then when finish..he offered me the last oreo he had..accepted it..then asked him again..in a joking manner..

me:so can i shake your hand again??
examiner:nonono..

haha..ended up laughing..haha.went down took my phone with steph..then walking out liao..then saw him walking out..and he was like..

examiner:any bus to central from here?
me and steph:have have..juz walk straight and turn left and walk all the way(cuz at main gate there)..

then it was the last i heard from him..haha..but realli..i would say its the best oral exam i realli had!!haha..

then yesterdy during SS..when finishing..ms azlinda was like wishing the rest of the people who haven take oral 'all the best'..and she was saying dun shake the examiner's hand ah..must pass the IC..dun be like someone..then i was like

me:cher..how you noe sia??
ms azlinda:one of my fren told me..tat one of the students did tat..

then dunno who bigbig mouth ah..

steph/yx:cher..tat was wat he did yesterday!!
ms.azlinda:realli?!??
me:ya..i forgot wat..

and you noe wat was her reaction??she burst out laughing la..was like..=_='''..haha..

well..guess got to stop here liao..my dad juz cme back..so better go off the com before my dad starts nagging..heh..ciao~

VIc^

Date : Sunday, August 20, 2006
Time : 10:10 pm

heyo..well..back from church and ccr..nothing much happen today though..

bro went to church late..soi ended up playing the first song..wasnt very good though..heh..but the rest of the songs were good..i feel like i have added a new 'weapon' to my drumming 'arsenal'..the 16-beat on the hi-hat!!yeah!!haha..

then after service got chem tuition..finally cleared on doubts on alkenes and alkanes..haha..maybe next topic is on moles??heh..

well..now Yilin and her family are at my place..and dad juz deided to order pizza..

YEAH..having pizza for dinner..heh..well..

guest stop here bah..you noe got to jiao tai the guests..heh..ciao~

VIc^

Date : Saturday, August 19, 2006
Time : 4:28 pm

does the problem lie with me or the opposite person??

i do not noe!!

Date :
Time : 2:17 pm

well well..another typical saturday..woke up at 1140..

replied some msges..went to shower..

had my lunch or would i say brunch..

then proceeded to do some chemistry..but only until my dad went out..

then the com was mine..cuz my bro is on the desktop..haha..

niwae..got music practice later..again..drummer..

cuz nelson had to go back to m'sia..

mum will be worship leader..

hope will have no trouble getting from song to song..

cuz will have not pianist..yup..bro will be on guitar..

gene will be on the bass..ya

guess tats abt it bah..nothing much to blog oso..ciao~

VIc^

ps to you(you noe its you):

lets see how long will you not talk me..see me or msg me..

am still doubting the words you said..

'i am not ignoring you or anything..me and you are still friends'..

so lets see how long this defination of 'friends' can last..

Date : Friday, August 18, 2006
Time : 9:33 pm

headache headache headache..its all over me now!!

blame soccer or wateva it caused it..

*sigh*..thought would change for the better after 3 days of absence..??

but how i noe??

no much changes..rite..still friends..but will and can never

be the same again like last time..

like wats new??

say hi..reply..

then wished me happy birthaday..

in which i had to accept it..said thanks..

reply was welcome..

and tat was the end of the conversation..

guess had nothing to tell me..

or would i say..chose not to tell me anything??

not even abt the camp??how fun or how bad izit..all because of him??

i dunno..nope..am not jealous..but feeling disappointed..

just the same like for the past few weeks..guess can do nothing abt it..

well..even if i take the first step..and ask hows the camp..

the reply will just be 'okie and those kind of words la'..

and trust me..wont go into eleboration de..i noe it de..

alright..away from it..

went to school..used the new bag tat shar gave me..

okie la..a little small in length though..heh..not complaining though..

then first period was mt..taych not around..and this honkie teacher(according to yanxiu) came in..

i think its the a-f-t for 2A de la..suppose to do worksheet..but ended up sleeping..

and then its like left 5 mins..she decided to wake me up..

she even rocked my table la..was like sososo pissed at her..

some more was feeling moody la..

she had better thank God i din shout at her..

its she she's so crap..as in realli CRAP!!

then hist..went through the China worksheet..

recess..went on a eating spree again..then double free period..slept through it..

chem did my work..eng..slacked..then homeroom..oso slacked..

after school..played soccer..then decided to go for maths..went in..

ended up leaving..its like take the worksheet liao..

then decided not to do..and sice looht not around..then i just left los..

haha..ended up playing soccer..then had a match within the team la..

my tem ended up winning..2-1..let in tat stupid goal..

cuz never gather the ball properly..then let in rebound..

wasnt too happy with myself though..but to make up for it..

made 5 saves..proper saves..heh..haha..

would give myself a rating of 6.5 out of 10 for my performance today..then came home los..

guess tats abt it..shall sleep early tonight to get rid of my headache!!

heh..ciao~

VIc^

Date : Thursday, August 17, 2006
Time : 5:51 pm

Happy Birthday to me..

Happy Birthday to Vicson..

Happy Birthday to me!!

well..happy sweet 17 to me..wishing myself..oh man..how pathetic??haha..no la..just kiding..celebrated liao..on sunday night..heh..

emmm..let me see..

1st 15 people to wish me happy birthday

on the actual day..which is today..haha

1.Sharlene

2.Janice

3.Nelson

4.Charmaine Lim

5.Li Jun

6.Tiffany

7.Kristina

8.Bernie

9.Jane Sim

10.Christabel

11.Yanxiu

12.Stephanie

13.Gwendolyn

14.Selene

15.Shila(i think)..heh

and the people tat gave me my beloved birthday bash..limited it to very little though..haha

Yanxiu,tiffany,steph,bernie,nelson..guess tats abt it..haha..and thank you brenda and constance for sparing me..haha

and got two bags as my birthday present..one of them totally not my style..maybe use it once or twice for the sake of using it..heh..yup..haha

guess tats abt it bah..got to live house at 1825..going to grandma's place for dinner..which means more hongbao!!yeah!!haha..yup..realli gtg liao..still got to put the photos for yanxiu into her thumbdrive..then pass to her later..yupyup..

so once again..

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!

VIc^

Date : Wednesday, August 16, 2006
Time : 10:59 pm

someone please tell me..

is it actually possible to solve a problem/conflict

through a couple of msges??

adding a few 'fake haha..lol..or hahhas' in

the latter stage of the msges..

i realli do not noe..

well..it seems i have got a few days of peace studying in school..

without the 'conflict' being 'postponed'..

having forced myself to smile for a photo on MY birthday celebration..

put on a 'mask' for the whole night till you left..

and yet all you could let out from your mouth was just a 'bye'??

not even a 'happy birthday' even though its advance??

can you even remember wat you wrote

on the card tat contributed to the album..

in which was a success??

'cant wait to see the look on your face again'

yes..you did saw the look again..

and when i managed to open my eyes to take a look around..

you were the first person tat i saw..

and all i saw was a emotion-less face..

my heart just went'down down down'..

not because of wateva tat happened recently..

but even being a 'supposedly' close fren of mine..

cant you even just manage a smile..

even when it means putting up a show??
it could have change the whole night..

on how i was feeling..

tat is how powerful just 1 smile can be..

just imagine if you would continue to put tat

lovely smile of yours on your face..

it could mean a whole lot of changes in our lives..

well..it may seem like i wan to lose this friend of mine..

but fact is i do not wan to..

having brought each other through difficults times..as frens..

its just so hard to let it go..

treat the person like a total stranger..

i myself would say tat its cruel..totally cold-hearted..

to even have these kind of thoughts..

so would i even bring myself to having these thoughts/ideas..

its a definite NONONO!!!

it may seemed sloved..but deep down in my heart..

the truth is..its not..emm..maybe just a little of it solved??

forcing myself/trying real hard to let go of you..

but the more i dun think of you..

it comes back more..even harder each time..

if only someone could provide me with a solution

to forget the events tat have happened..

and tat could revert back to the kind of relationship

tat we had over the few years..i would just be so so thankful for it..

sadly..its not possible..some more with the after effects of everything..

hai..guess tats abt it..cant bring myself to write any more..

just feel like letting all out again..

if only i could have the 'perfect' birthday from you..

a sign/signal tat everything is resolved..

how nice could it actually get..hai..

still all lies down to the word..IF..

VIc^

Date : Monday, August 14, 2006
Time : 5:28 pm

First of all..

thank you mum, bro and helen sis for preparing everything..

even though got some loopholes tat i discovered..haha..

and

Special thanks to auntie liam kim for making the album..

also..thank you people for writing the cards an decorating the stuff..

just to name a few people.. 'sisterhood':yanxiu,steph,tiff..,glenys,bernie,gwen,rae,johanna,amanda..etc..

to make the album a success..

another special thanks to Koh Family for making tat video..

.just for me..feel so honoured..you know??haha

even though i could have contributed more photos..haha..thank you..

and also for all the people who turned up..just to eat..??haha..

and the people who bought/cook the food..

thank you auntie janice and uncle roger for buying the cake..

thank you whoever who booked the chalet..

and teng li for cooking my 'dinner'..haha..

and also for all the presents tat i received..

be in in ang bao or presents..

thank you..

I realli had a great time last night..

to all the crap talking to frens and stuff..

and the CLOSE-to-tears stuff..hugging and stuff..

to the 'toture' some of you all had to endure due to my parents..sorrie abt it..haha..

bet you all had a hard time hiding this secret..esp my classmates..

with them seeing me everyday..

esp yx..who initiated the card thingy in my class..haha..once again..

a hugh THANK YOU to all who are involved!!

its one of my best birthdays' i ever had..i think??

haha.yup..

well..away from the 'thank you' list..had mixed emotions last night..wasnt feeling 'good' as in tat sense..emotionally la..shant eleborate any more..blog abt it some other time??and the pics will be up within the next few blogs..juz got to compile all the photos tat were taken..yup..haha..ciao~

VIc^

Date : Friday, August 11, 2006
Time : 6:33 pm

REALITY FINALLY STRUCK ME!!

right

left

center

got back my chinese o level results today..not fair la..why all the schools release at different timing de?

fidel got her's at abt 1100 la..then we like got to wait till 1215??

taych came in..and as usual his routine..

wrote down all the stats for the paper los..

how many people got As and stuff and the oral marks..

no one got A from the sec 5na..

and my class only two people got Distinction for oral la..

gave out 1 by 1..then my turn..

its destined..facts..

in the 3 characters that were written on the piece of paper..

C6(M)

the moment i saw it..my whole heart sank..

i dunno why..i was expecting it..and yet i felt that way..

or is it because i have let my parents down or wat?

its like fidel got a B3 and she wants to retake..

bernie msged me and told me

'i get onli 3 leh'..was like..wth..

its like so so demoralising la..i get a B3..

i wont ever touch chinese again la..

and yet they all want to retake..

haiz..including tiff and yx..

both got B3..and both plan on retaking..

its like totally got no mood to do anything la..wanted to play soccer..

but ended uphaving the worse game of my life..

letting in more goals then i ever did in a single match..

then hannah pass me the pic tat she was supposed to pass to me..

was like..'oh..okie..'

was debating shld i take it or not..

i like just have that feeling that she is avoiding me la..

like how long never msg me liao..

like after i found out wat was going on..still considered as frens??

i dunno..hai..then went for maths..

did finish the paper 1 in less then 1 hr??

went out..wanted to play soccer again..

but netballers were starting their training..

so din get to play much..if not playing..t

hen was sitting there and stoning on wat has happened recently..frens..and results and all..hai..

wat is happening to this world?!?!?!hai!!

guess tats abt it bah..ciao~

VIc^

Date : Thursday, August 10, 2006
Time : 9:16 pm

bored..spent my day doing nothing??okie la.did 4 maths paper2 question..then got lazy..realli have been stoning the whole day..woke up late..did my work..spent unnecessary time thinking abt some unnecessary stuff..like abt the past??

comparing it to now..its a lot of differences..

three years ago to now??

three months ago to now??

or would you say just a mere three days ago??

having all these thoughts just made me feel real hopeless..useless..unwanted??

felt like just letting all out..crying??

guess there is more then 1 way to let it all out..other then crying??

going to force myself to type that 4 pathetic letters??

H A H A..

guess tats abt it bah?shall catch up on last weeks lost then can watch today's eposide..yup..ciao~

VIc^

Date : Wednesday, August 09, 2006
Time : 11:56 pm

well..just came back from ndp not long ago only..haha..it was like..not going de..then this morning my dad ask me wan to go not..cuz my mum dun wanna go..cuz my uncle gave him two tickets wat..haha..so was deciding either go ndp or sentosa..decided on ndp..haha..reason being??

wanted to take video on the flypast and the fireworks..haha..

was not realli interested in the performances put up..

was only interested on the parade, flypast and fireworks..haha..

and its like saw a gb girl tat looks like raq..but according to yx..she's not involved..so going to ask her on fri..haha..and oso met new people..haha..all thanks to my dad..its like after the family left..was like regretting..

why din i ask for her email add or hp no.??

hai..haha..nvm..think will have way to get it..heh..yup..guess tats abt it bah..lazy to post on the pics i took..heh..so there..ciao~

VIc^

Date : Tuesday, August 08, 2006
Time : 8:42 pm

haiz..why of all people me??

can say my whole family under 'torture' now la..why??because now in my house..there is like a distant relative staying at my house..and the worse thing is she's adopted from the US..cuz my grand-aunt is living there..and she adopt her los..she's a black..not being racist or wat la..and she's eight years old only..and nearly my height..twice my size la..and she's so so so noisy!!goodness..and she's staying at my house for another nite..??and freaking hell!!told her not to touch the com..and she touched it!!aarrgghh..so killing me!!touching anything/everything without permission..and now playing with the camera..going into my room just like nobody business!!and i have to survive another nite!!so isolating myself from her..even m dog is not spared..she has totally got no freedom la..asking the dog to follow her..wherever she goes..imagine hearing her saying 'come come..stay stay..fetch..down..lie..lie..' all these commands over and over and over agian!!haiz..its so so so killing me!!God save me!!why cant she just stay quiet for like even just 1minute??and now she so fascinated by the fireworks tat are being displayed now over at city area..where can see from my house..aarrgghh..think i better stop here la..before she sees it..heh..haha..please pray for me!!heh..ciao~

VIc^

Date :
Time : 7:39 pm

long skirts they were looking for..so old-fashioned la..

tats prob the reason for getting the consolation prize..

instead of being in the top three..

disappointment sums it up..

VIc^

Date : Monday, August 07, 2006
Time : 9:44 pm

so so so many things tat i dunno..

even though i seem to noe them..

still considered as frens?

i realli do not noe..after all tat has happened..

VIc^

Date :
Time : 9:35 pm

life is just liddat..some things are just beyond my control..

totally nothing that i can do about it at all..

just so so so cruel to people..

VIc^

Date :
Time : 6:10 pm

heyhey..well..juz got back from lunch..so deided to blog on th Festival of Praise..as din get the chance to use the com.cuz for the past three nights have been reaching home at like 12+..yup..haha..

well..so back to friday..haha..decided to pon maths to go FOP los..so met up with bernie and another fren..and went there early first to queue..haha..first day the sits were good..and help the ccr people reserved the sits..and the usher was like so kind la..help us los..haha..started..the songs were like 'huh?!?!..wat songs are this??'..tat was for City Christian Church..haha..until Don Moen came out..it was much better..haha..

second day of it..was better la..haha..cuz knew abit of the songs wat..haha..and one thing..the ushers cant be trusted la..its like wanted the same sits as the first day..then the usher told us..for guests..okie.then 10 mins later i look at the section..saw SCHOOL people sitting there la..ask them if vip/guest not..they were like no..its like wth!! la..haha..nvm..bygones..haha..and its like when waiting for the gates to open..i went down to 7-11 to get a drink..went down the stairs..and i saw the sec1s..haha..blame me for being kind..told them could cut into my queue..then reach 7-11..bought drink.and saw glenys they all..so once again los..cut..haha..then she came oso..haha..and the usher and her look like twins la..!!haha..

third day was the best!!haha..went to indoor straight after having lunch..cuz noe that chc will be having their service wat..so knew will be first few..haha..went there..decided to go the east gate..after waiting at the north gate for the past two days..went up and we like within the first 20 people la..haha..then like abt 4+ close to 5 liddat..decided to check on the queue..went to the back..then when i walking back to my place..saw someone!!haha..saw my supposedly' childhood' fren..haha..so i just stood there and 'stared' at her..then she realised..and she was like..'AH..CHILDHOOD FREN!!'..haha..and her name is jacqueline!!last time saw her was the camp last year la..haha..like abt 8 months never see her liao la..haha.. then the service was good!!haha..cuz knew almost all the songs..haha..and oya..still got the speaker..haha..its like he comes from US..borned in Argentina..and speaks with a spanish slang..haha..something like Pink Panther liddat..haha..damn funny la..lol.. and one more thing!!i will be back next year!!cuz it will be Delirious and a band from Jakarta!!haha..cool sia!!

okie..shall show you some of the pics taken at/during the FOP..haha..yup..

stage..before starting..

during the first day..

City Christian Church in action..

taken after the second nite..

third day..while waiting for the gates to be opened..

taken during the wait..

ooh..and my 'supposedly childhood fren'..haha

last nite..at mac..having dinner..i am a special order k?!haha..

tats all i have to blog..yup..

VIc^

Date : Saturday, August 05, 2006
Time : 2:26 am

aello..

me got back from Festival Of Praise not long ago onli..went for supper then came home los..now feeling very very tired.. added some stuff to my blog..then decided to have a short short post since i am adding stuff to my blog..yup..so here it is..well..the FOP was okie la..cuz dunno how to sing the songs..heh..but will be going for the next two nights..so hope will be improving..the songs quite nice oso la..okie..and..i was already yawning during the sermon la..haha..yup..and leaving house at 12+..to reach there to queue up..cuz gates will be opening at 530pm!! so early..so tat sums it up..shall elaborate more abt my today when i am free and not so tired..heh.. ciao~

VIc^

Date : Tuesday, August 01, 2006
Time : 10:08 pm

well.well..someone said blogging is a method of killing time and having joy..(ahem..yours truthly kind GENIUS dawn..haha)so i shall try and have some JOY rite now..haha..

today nothing much happened..phy went through some worksheet..then pe played game los..some frisbee game la..quite fun..the whole team(Dion,Ashraf.R,Kumares,Me,Raq,Christabel and even Jessilyn) linked up well..haha..but by the end of the two periods..i was damn freaking wet la..forgot to bring towel.haha..then recess..dunno why wateva i eat got no taste de la(had like wanton and pizza la..even the ribena i had was tasteless)..and also dunno why got no mood la..juz liddat..its like during pe ws good la..was it the comments tat sam and yanxiu made or izit just myself??nvm..haha..then had chem..tat period.i slept through it..maths..did my work..and eng oso did my work..had to write compo..on CHANGES..din noe wat to write..ended up writing crap..haha..

the stayed back with rae and amanda..did 2 maths paper1..slack a while..then decided to go home..and 1 thing today k..

I DIN TOUCH A SOCCER BALL TODAY!!

(this section is for selene..haha..i am not a soccer freak k!haha)

haha..ya..came home..slack and online till now los..and 1 thing..juz got another godsis..haha..settled out everything with her..complications and stuff all over then she asked me..then i was like oh..okie los..heh..

yup..guess tats abt it bah..got to quickly draft my letter for my early dismissal on thurs and after tat rest my legs..the muscles are starting to cramp liao..haha..ciao~

VIc^